the ocean always dreamed blue dreams

My dad died Saturday. The world seems a darker place without him

He was a quiet man, but he made his presence felt in so many ways. I remember running to hug him after work and the smell of his suit and he held us close. I remember helping him bring in logs for the fire and the careful way he arranged the them. I remember the food he made, the chili, the chicken noodle soup and the best potato salad I ever ate. I remember helping him wash the car-which was really just an excuse to ...

I adore Thanksgiving. Unlike his more bloated sister, Christmas, Thanksgiving doesn’t promise more than it can deliver. Yesterday was no exception. I felt peace, love, pleasure, happiness. My cup (and plate) runneth over.

Having said that, I have to admit that this blog is mostly about the best meal I have ever made. I’m not a cook, really. As my oldest son once said, I heat. I commute, I work, the budget and time are limited, and our meals are often reflective of that. In the midst ...

I, falling
and the moist night air pressing
against me,
a carpet of damp, sweet-smelling flowers

What will happen when I land?
Does death await,
a kindly hand closing my eyes,
or a sadistic lover,
granting me a stay of execution
while opening the door to exquisite pain?

I find that I am watching myself,
a lonely majestic hawk
that flew into the sunset and landed
on a railing
looking ...

It was crappy week. Work was OK, although there's never enough time to get everything done. But we've been extra busy and will be for a few months more, both at home and at school.

And the really difficult part, one of my youngest sons friends got in some serious trouble. The police came to our house and questioned my son. Life is just not the same when the police come to the door.

My heart is breaking for the young man who is in trouble, and for his mother. That has ...

When I look at photographs of my childhood I am always struck by how young we all were, my parents and grandparents, my brother and sister and myself, and by how beautiful we all were. My parents in particular seem caught in a lovely light of youth and health. At the time they seemed so prosaic to me. I loved them-then and now-but they did not seem beautiful. In fact, I would venture to say that I, impossible as it seems, took them for granted. I have tried not to do that for years, but it doesn't ...