failure what does it mean?!!

[summer grace]

I hate math in general. I am also taking a course in math, and believe me, it is an uphill struggle, but I have to do it. I hate the word problems though, just hate them. I don't think society should make people study useless things that are never going to do them any good, and they are just going to forget anyway, and then define success or failure by it. But, believe me, it does, and you must do it, and so I plow on, counting the months until I am done with this math, and I can truly say I am not a failure.

[manolia]

It happens to me sometimes that i go below expectations mine or other's.
what is supposed to happen in that moment let go of everything (coz that's what i want to do) although you know that you failed in something your good at?
OR just keep trying believing it will be better?!!
BUT what if it doesn't get better?!!
What happens when you realize that you r a commoner not unique not special u r just as everyone else is?

can someone plz help me and tell me how am i supposed to deal with it?

Untill now i have never understood what is success. Is it the acquisition of great amounts of money? No. Many brilliant artists and authors heve died destitute. Is it a matter of fame? Wrong again (you can be really famous but mediocre). Is it success in your field of work? Then again not all fields of work provide opportunities for innovations. That is just a thought.

In my opinion, most peolple do not really know in what they are good at. And some of them never find out (so much talent lost. You see, i believe that all people are good at something). So it's important to explore or rather realise your own faculties. But beware. You may think that you are good at something and you may be wrong and viceversa.

Well this may sound like a cliche to you but you must never give up. You must continue your efforts and you WILL get better at whatever it is that you do. When i was a university student (not so long ago) in my field of study (which is considered a dificult one) and now in my field of work i have seen some not so promising individuals thrive. And that can be only achieved with hard work and perseverance (now, you do sound promising you know!). Never let a failure (and sometimes more than one) detain you. Even the greatest scientists sometimes failed (and some others stumbled upon the truth by accident).

I do not understand the phrase "up to the expectations of others". You should set your own standards. But be carefull. Do not be over-exigent with yourself. Remember that what defines humanity is the act of making mistakes.

And last (but not least) What's wrong with being common?? Some of the most interesting people i've met were wonderfully common.

[dramasnot6]

I absolutely agree Summer grace. I have always been frustrated at and despised math, but work hard at it nonetheless because I know how important it is to get into University with decent math skills. I always believed math was neccesary for your average person with a non-mathematical proffesion, but to a much lesser extent then we are forced to learn in most places. Probably just 9th grade math is all we REALLY need up to.

[summer grace]

Yeah, you are right about math. Some math is very practical, and we need that. It's when I get into algebra stuff that I just sigh. I think it is easier to be a failure or feel like a failure in the area of math rather than anything else, if you are not good at it.

I think fear of failure causes you intense anxiety that you really can only forget by going to sleep. I am so afraid of failure, because I feel like it reflects on me. I think that is natural, but how much does it reflect on you? I am so afraid of failure right now, it haunts me all day and night.

It did last fall as well, but it ended up not happening, but how is that any assurance that it might not happen this time? That's how I think all day, besides OF math which makes me afraid of failure. I'm just confused about the real meaning of failure and how much fear of failure might actually make you fail. Or is it better not to be afraid?

[kilted exile]

Yes, the average person doesnt need to know a great deal of maths - just basic arithmetic. However it is useful to continue teaching math because it relates to logic and thinking. If it is too confusing just consider it as another language.

[sam96]

Hey,What's wrong with math,i love math(teachers' pet speaking ).But i agree it is too much sometimes but it's an easy subject to get grades in so it's better than some other subjects.

Manolia:
That's really nice "explore your own faculties".I try to convince myself that i'm bad at everything(even in the things that i'm good at) to force myself to exert more efforts(sounds wierd i know).
So,When i do fail i feel like it's a disaster.
By the way what was your studying field?(I do sound promising?!! )
I know i should make my own expectations but i don't like when someone is disappointed in me.

[byquist]

Just find one item you can hold on to and don't make it too vast. As in "What About Bob?" -- babysteps. Babystepping.

Or Polonious to Laertes: "To thine own self be true and, as it follows the night the day, thou cans't not be false to any man." -- may not be exact. Thus, try to be truthful to life, but not selfish.

Also, not to put yourself down, which accomplishes nothing. One leader said: "Treat yourself like a dog," partly in humor, but meaning that: Most of us treat dogs nice. Yes, we discipline 'em, but mostly we compliment them. So, treat yourself suchwise. Treat yourself like a dog.

[manolia]

To Sam96:

Your method is a cruel one. Why on earth should you convince yourself that you are bad at everything?? There are other ways to exert yourself. You asked about my profession. I am a Civil Engineer. You say that "you know you should make your own expectations but you don't like when someone is disappointed in you". Well..even if you were perfect in everything there will be always someone who will be unsatisfied (people tend to behave that way).So what are you going to do about that? What i mean is that in your life you should value only the opinion of people who are worth it. I am sure you already know who these people are.

[sam96]

Manolia:
Well,I know it's somewhat an eccentric method but it pushes me forward(most of the time ).
I was talking about these people(and they r a lot!!).When i do something good they expect me to be good all the time and i expect me to be good all the time.

[andave_ya]

Sam:
It's good that you expect yourself to be good all the time. You should. But you can't be. I can't be either, and that is one thing I have had to struggle in learning. but there is a difference between being good at something and just working through it. Either one is open to you, it's just up to you whether to like it or not. (I've decided that I am in no wise going to like math, no matter how good I get at it. If I get good at it.)

Yes, yes...Preserverance can pay off. But there is such a thing as a "lost cause", you know

There is, Neo, but rarely. You can do anything you set your mind to. The sky's the limit!

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Sam:
It's good that you expect yourself to be good all the time. You should. But you can't be. I can't be either, and that is one thing I have had to struggle in learning. but there is a difference between being good at something and just working through it. Either one is open to you, it's just up to you whether to like it or not. (I've decided that I am in no wise going to like math, no matter how good I get at it. If I get good at it.)



There is, Neo, but rarely. You can do anything you set your mind to. The sky's the limit!

Well, well...Aren't we a high-spirited, optimistic one, eh?

A lost cause is..."Rare", you say?

*Sigh*

It seems that there ain't nothing I can say and/or do to change your mind, is there?

Eh...I wouldn't want to anyway. I like your high-spirited and optimistic energy! Even I'm starting to be affected by it!

Woohoo!!! The sky's the limit!!! I'm gonna set my mind to fly!!! I know I can fly!!! Woohoo!!!

*Neo runs, jumps off a cliff, and flaps his arms*

Woohoo!!! I'm can fly!!! I can-Huh!? Uh-Oh...

*Falls flat on the ground*

Ugh...I...Believe...I...Can...Fly...I...Believe... I...Can...Touch...The...Sky...

Hehe...Just kidding! But I still like your high-spirited and optimistic energy! Keep that spirit!!!

[andave_ya]

Sorry -- maybe I am a little annoying at times. It's just that I honestly feel life is good! And, I just noticed, you're in Stockton! I'm in Hayward, an hour from SF.

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Sorry -- maybe I am a little annoying at times. It's just that I honestly feel life is good! And, I just noticed, you're in Stockton! I'm in Hayward, an hour from SF.

Nah...What are you apologizing for? Apologizing for feeling that life is good? Nonsense!

Umm...But that can be a little annoying at times...I mean, to some people. Not me, of course!

When you say "SF", are you talking about San Francisco? Hmm...But I'm in Stockton.

[andave_ya]

Thanks for the input! I'll keep it in mind.

and yup, an hour from San Francisco. Do you ever come down here?

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Thanks for the input! I'll keep it in mind.

and yup, an hour from San Francisco. Do you ever come down here?

Unfortunately...No. I've never been down to San Francisco. Have you ever came up to Stockton?