IF LAWYERS CAN BE DISBARRED # 2
If Lawyers can be disbarred
Can dustmen be well disposed?
Or can tour guides be detoured
And must models be deposed?
A QUESTION OF BALANCE
My father in law is a pain in the ***
I hope I’m not like him when I’m older
My brother in law is just as bad
A little cockier and certainly bolder
But they’re very balanced individuals
They have a chip on each shoulder
A CONFUSED SPERM ASKED FOR DIRECTIONS
A confused sperm asked for directions
Not really a masculine trait
But he asked and was told
Oh I wouldn’t start from here mate
THAT'S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS THAT IS # 2
That's political correctness that is
When my little neighbour Allen
A short *** with a chip on his shoulder
Is actually vertically challenged
BLUE NUN
Mother Superior called together
All the nuns in the convent
“I must tell you all something”
She began her grave statement
“Sisters we have a case
Of gonorrhea in our community”
“Thank God,” said an old nun
“I’m so sick of Chianti”
CHIRPY, CHIRPY CHEEP, CHEEP
Why do men whistle?
Chirrup chirp and cheep
When they are sitting
On the toilet seat
They seem to whistle through
Every strain and gripe
Does it help them remember?
Which end they need to wipe
TOY BOY
My teenage daughter
Bless her heart came home today
With a Yoyo
I think she said his name was Ray
CULTURE VULTURE
Isn’t culture wonderful?
Music, theatre, poetry
Something for everyone
To feel or hear or see
The performing arts
I particularly like poetry
Especially poetry readings
With the writer at the mic
I go to festivals and slams
From time to time
I like to go to a recital
And ask why the poem doesn’t rhyme
NOT BEING PREVIOUS
For those who don’t believe
In sex before marriage
Those who want the horse
Before the carriage
I should point out
It isn’t premarital sex per se”
If there is no intention
Of having a wedding day
IT IS A SAD FACT OF LIFE THAT IS # 1
It is a sad fact of life that is
Something of a curse
Left to themselves things
Will go from bad to worse